Why You Should Let Me Touch Your Butt: A Presentation

Employ at your discretion, but user beware–it’s pretty powerful. Here is why you should let me touch your butt:

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80 Responses

  1. Jane April 1st 2012 8:50 PM

    that kitten is jeremiah’s icon….

    • Angie April 3rd 2012 7:38 AM

      Yes, yes it is minion :’)

      • Danielle Tuck June 3rd 2012 3:36 PM

        This is the best comment ever!

        • erma652 May 6th 2014 9:16 PM

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    • Sarah Jackson July 24th 2012 4:29 AM

      Coz I am doing what I can 😀

  2. B-Spunk April 1st 2012 11:28 PM

    I like it. Clean and dirty all at the same time.

  3. Kalin April 2nd 2012 1:02 AM

    Anyone else notice the double asterisk isn’t in the sentence about making the cookies? You sly fox.

  4. Donne Udine April 2nd 2012 3:20 AM

    :)) The line graph is the best!!

  5. Fyrehed April 2nd 2012 10:21 AM

    Well I don’t know about everyone else, but I’m definitely ready to have my butt touched (preferably passionately squeezed).

  6. Kara April 2nd 2012 11:22 AM

    Sitting in class Stumbln, when suddenly I come across this and burst out laughing 😛

  7. Maria April 2nd 2012 12:47 PM

    That’s very interesting… 😛

  8. Abbey April 2nd 2012 1:57 PM

    I’d let you touch my butt…. only coz you offer cookies lol

    • Bacon and Beer April 3rd 2012 10:00 AM


      • Gay Rapist April 3rd 2012 1:52 PM

        fat whore

        • Stevo1002 April 4th 2012 8:21 AM

          Gay rapist

          • Gay Rapist April 4th 2012 10:49 AM

            What can I say? I love a man built of Bacon and Beer.

    • john April 3rd 2012 7:41 PM

      Don’t listen to them Abbey, they are just jealous cause they don’1t have any cookies.

      • Gay Rapist April 4th 2012 8:15 AM

        It’s true. I want cookies. She can have her butt touched by whomever she likes, but Beer and Bacon will be getting his butt touched by me. I’m already lubing up and spreading his hairy cheeks now. Be still, trembling angel… 😀 Sooo excited!

        • Ham and Vodka April 4th 2012 10:14 PM


          • Gay Rapist April 5th 2012 7:40 AM

            You know it sexy 😉 I’m long, hard, and eager for dat ass. Back it up on me. Do it now, or I’ll have to make you bottom bitch. I just can’t control myself and it’s your fault: that drunken, salty body of yours is too hot to resist.

    • Ryan April 4th 2012 10:45 PM

      What the hell guys? A girl wants her butt touched and you insult her? Do you not want a hot piece of @$$/ Poontang? Douches.

      • A bloo bloo bloo September 26th 2012 12:53 AM

        Is it because no one has offered you a plate of cookies and butt touching?

  9. Sports Bettor April 2nd 2012 6:27 PM

    Hahaha. The kitten sells it!

  10. Brandon April 2nd 2012 6:28 PM
  11. I Have Diarrhea April 3rd 2012 3:08 PM

    Anyone can touch my buttttt!!!!!!

    • Cheese sticks July 14th 2015 12:17 PM

      I don’t think anyone wants to mr. Diarrhea

  12. BorednRichmondVa April 3rd 2012 7:09 PM

    I tried touching my own butt, its just not the same.

  13. la April 4th 2012 6:18 AM

    make this available for download, please

  14. Jack April 4th 2012 6:27 AM

    HAHAHAHA! This is hilarious.

  15. Bryttanie April 4th 2012 10:17 AM

    Challenge accepted

  16. Beetlebong April 4th 2012 3:28 PM

    I’m going to have to see those cookies first…

  17. TB April 4th 2012 6:03 PM

    Freaking hilarious!

  18. Ham and Vodka April 4th 2012 10:16 PM

    Funny stuff BTW

  19. Kristine April 5th 2012 9:27 AM

    He had me at cookies 😛

  20. Flowers April 19th 2012 7:35 AM

    I donated my Butt to science fiction.

  21. vanessa May 22nd 2012 5:29 AM

    ok…you can touch my butt.

  22. Marmar May 27th 2012 9:55 AM

    That is so funny!!!!! How did you come up with that?

  23. VirginSlayer227 May 31st 2012 6:02 AM

    I sit next to one of the hottest girls at school. Showed her this in class. Got poon.

  24. northierthanthou June 8th 2012 12:35 AM

    Ending with a kitten for the win!

  25. Jack Vermicelli June 9th 2012 8:39 PM

    The double asterisk footnote (slide 5) doesn’t correspond to any originating symbol in the body of the slide.

    • Kurtis Engle September 20th 2014 1:03 AM

      Oh, no!

  26. In Home Computer Repair in Calgary June 11th 2012 8:21 PM

    Chocolate chip cinnamon roll cookies?? Where do I find such a thing?

    • jessica June 15th 2012 12:10 AM

      i know right… i gots to find them 😀

  27. Jackled June 13th 2012 6:46 PM


  28. Herple Derple June 15th 2012 4:19 AM

    Derping derpp derp derp derp.

  29. PaulTheCabDriver June 16th 2012 12:36 AM

    Oh holy cow, just get a job with the TSA then you can touch all the butts yu want.

    • Dani November 22nd 2012 6:38 AM

      this exactly

      and you don’t have to make cookies

      or even ask

  30. Person of awesomness June 19th 2012 3:30 PM

    Cookie love! 😀

  31. dis girl is awesome June 19th 2012 4:07 PM

    trade the cookies in for some warm cinnamon rolls and you wouldn’t only be able to touch my but. you could touch my boobs lol

  32. Callysta June 21st 2012 7:51 AM

    I love the cookies and let me eat it

  33. Amazing June 22nd 2012 12:45 AM

    Very interesting post

  34. Butt Toucher June 23rd 2012 7:57 AM

    There are so many reasons to touch butt….

  35. Sunny June 25th 2012 10:27 PM

    ☻/ This is Bob, copy & paste him
    / \ so he can take over the internet.

  36. @pdk117 June 25th 2012 11:32 PM

    You are the best out there. I have never read funnier stuff before you came along. Thanks. Paul @pdk117

  37. Your mom July 12th 2012 10:24 PM

    LOL! Maybe I should show this to my crush…. O.O

  38. Sexy Time July 30th 2012 8:15 AM

    That’s a very convincing way to sum things up. Haha, I like it, I will use this to see if it works.

  39. pie flavoured pie August 3rd 2012 3:46 AM

    This is so funny! lol~!

  40. Benny August 13th 2012 7:54 PM

    This is hilarious.

  41. Bakeca Roma August 14th 2012 3:14 AM

    LOL. This butt got to be touched…

  42. Sean August 20th 2012 1:25 PM

    this guy has to have touched a butt before.

  43. Jess September 13th 2012 1:48 AM

    Stumbled upon this post and I have to say that while I won’t let you touch mine, I have to applaud you on your efforts. Nearly made me say Yes! Haha

  44. Kynesha September 13th 2012 7:16 AM

    smh….i have no tolerance for stupidity. “oh haha you should let me touch your but” gtfo of here.

  45. delvis September 25th 2012 7:48 PM

    women don’t understand logic and reasoning…

  46. Hayley October 10th 2012 12:27 PM

    This is a perfectly put presentation. Anyone remember Uni. Speech Class??

  47. jamie November 16th 2012 5:42 PM

    You can spank my butt

  48. Guilherme December 29th 2012 9:41 PM

    This is brilliant, i’m sending it to some people..

  49. katie January 3rd 2013 12:16 PM

    You know what, this would actually make me want to let you touch my butt. well done good sir.

  50. Ed February 21st 2013 5:40 PM

    I’ll wax it up, (it’s a rather old and hairy butt). I’ll also bake you a pie.

  51. Alexis March 3rd 2013 11:02 AM

    I would SO let them touch my butt!

  52. Stephanie March 8th 2013 6:12 AM

    Just perfect! This sounds like my boyfriend wrote it. Although I make the cookies, while he is touching my butt, we all get satisfied. hehe

  53. Queen of Winter March 27th 2013 3:53 AM

    I’m not sure I like chocolate chip cinnamon roll cookies…can you make them gluten free? Can I get just plain chocolate chip cookies and then a cinnamon roll maybe to go with my coffee the morning after? Is that kitten going to interrupt us?

  54. Samantha April 25th 2013 11:03 AM

    hahaha. awesome. this is something my boyfriend would use against me. haha

  55. disqus_AfYsFAyw6E May 1st 2013 4:25 PM

    Samantha, I have something better to hold against you. :-)))

  56. Kimberly Diamond May 10th 2013 9:08 AM

    only for the cookies lol

  57. Ashley June 12th 2013 6:12 AM

    Im convincee!

  58. Mikaela Peters June 16th 2013 10:23 PM

    you can touch my butt

  59. Dustin June 25th 2013 1:41 AM

    Wish I had this in that awkward middle school age…

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  61. Yeah January 22nd 2014 1:35 PM

    I got a butt massage once. Best feeling ever.

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